ARTIST'S STATEMENT

A few years back, I had a moment. I was in California, atop a hill during dusk. My view included the ocean, some cliffs, hills, a city beneath me, and the largest sky that I had ever seen. As the sun slowly set, I found myself astonished. I know I had seen sunsets before. There has been one for every day that I've been alive. Yet, I had this feeling that I never truly had been paying attention. Was this true? Had such poignant moments like this occurred so many times previously? Why did I never notice? Was it the lush and canopied landscape of the southeastern United States that made the sky seem smaller and further from me? Was it the hilly and mountainous landscape of my childhood and young adulthood that somehow jealously pushed the sky away from me? Was it the urban landscapes of my adulthood that kept me preoccupied focusing on the cracks in the sidewalk and the shadows from buildings? As I stood there, I wondered if the city below me had been frozen still in the wake of such a sight?

The sky was huge, vivid, beautiful, fleeting, dying before my eyes. On that hill, I felt so small. The city below me made me feel significant. I knew where I belonged. The streets led to places I needed to be. The streets had names. It all made sense. Below, protected from the sunsets, there are no questions as to why I'm there and where I fit in. As long as I stayed below the sky, I was protected from the great questions that have no answers. The shear beauty of the oranges, pinks, yellows and blues somehow softened my realization that the sun has given similar displays every day of my life as well as every day of every human for an amount of time that is impossible for me to comprehend. As I swallow hard, I realize that this beauty will continue on every day -long after I, and the city below me cease to be. The buildings and trees of the city that protect me have no jurisdiction at this altitude. Watching the setting sun sink into the ocean, I'm in the living room of a great oblivion. What lies ahead? It all feels so cruel. Yet, I feel a great sensation go through my body. Beauty is impermanence. Beauty is uncertainty. Beauty is a cycle that eventually comes to an end. In these moments, I'm cut down and rebuilt.

Landscape, place and memory have always in some way, been a driving force behind my work. Sometimes I use representational images of people and places to capture the landscape that exists below the sky, the material- the familiar. Lately, I'm finding my mind venturing to that hill, star struck by the evening colors that look down on my city. The colors steadily complete their own daily cycle, busily ending their day. The skies appear to hover approvingly over the city, unconcerned or oblivious to the streets, people, and daily rituals that are significant to me. Above me, possessing the secrets all humans hope to own, the intertwined and blending hues keep mum. The sunset promises me nothing more than tomorrow's inevitable sunrise.